This image is the perfect example of the American ideal that "doing it all" makes you a strong woman. Most countries don't expect women to have two full-time jobs at once ...
When Max hit the 12-week mark a few days ago, it occurred to me that at home in the US, I would be expected to go back to work now. As a Canadian resident though, I still have nine months of leave ahead of me.
Max woke up every two to three hours all night long until he was basically 11 weeks old. By 12 weeks I was finally beginning to feel physically, mentally and emotionally stronger and more rested, but I still have a long way to go. Working by day and caring for a demanding baby by night would be utterly exhausting, and that is an understatement.
The bonding process with my sweet boy is continuing steadily, but we are still getting to know one another. Max only recently began smiling, and I am finally figuring out how to read his cues. Go back to work at this crucial stage? I can't even imagine it! But that is what any working woman in America is faced with, and to me this is heartbreaking.
This article from 2007 points out that the US is one of only FIVE industrialized countries in the world that offers no form of paid maternity benefits.
http://www.inc.com/news/articles/200702/family.html
US maternity policies in general are non-existent, making it one of the worst places in the world for new moms. A handful of states and companies offer some financial benefits for six weeks, to select groups of women - but even these programs are not exclusively for parents, but are filed under disability programs! Being a parent is not a disability!
Everybody suffers in this scenario - newborn babies need a loving parent who knows them and cares for them. They thrive best on breastmilk for at least six months. Not only does going back to work early make this a huge challenge, but more support should also be available to women who struggle with breastfeeding. There were several times that I might have given up on it without Canada's amazing (free) public health care system that allowed me to make multiple visits to lactation consultants when things got really tough.
Moms who have the chance to establish a strong bond with their babies and can regularly breastfeed are at lower risk for postpartum depression. Families that build strong relationships from babyhood have a better chance at stability and happiness as they grow.
Many of the problems in the US today - childhood obesity, generally unhealthy lifestyles - could be helped if we just invested more time and energy as a country into our children and families. Parenting is hard work, and we need to help each other out in raising our country's future citizens.
At least Obama's new health care plan ensures women will be able to pump breastmilk while at work:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/41249239/ns/business-careers/ This is a small victory, but we really need to see more action! This was one of the major considerations for Ben and I when determining whether we would move back to the US or not, but most people do not have a choice.
